Have you ever tangled with the tax man?

A man was called in for an audit by the IRS. So, he asked his

> >accountant for advice on what to wear. "Wear your worst clothing and an

> >old pair of shoes. Let them think you are a pauper," the accountant

> >replied.

> >

> >He then asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice:

> >"Don't let them intimidate you. Wear your best suit and an expensive

> >tie."

> >

> >Confused, the man went to his Parish Priest who would surely know the

> >correct answer. He told him of the

> >conflicting advice he had received, and asked what he should do.

> >

> >"Let me tell you a story," replied the Priest. "A woman, about to be

> >married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. Her mother

> >advised, "Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to

> >your neck and wool socks." But when the woman asked her best friend,

> >she got conflicting advice: "Wear your sexiest negligee, with a V-neck

> >right down to your navel.'"

> >

> >The man did not understand. "But, Father, what does all this have to do

> >with my problem with the IRS?"

> >

> >"It doesn't matter what you wear," replied the Priest, ......"You're

> >going to get screwed."

> >

I HAVE tangled with the tax man. I think they just make stuff up as they go along.

So true, so true! Thanks for the laugh! I needed one before I head off to the doctor!

A belly wiggler for the day -- thanks ;0]

Without a kiss

bmgwl: busting my gut with laughter. roflpmp: rolling on floor laughing &peeing my pants. fotcl: falling off the chair laughing.

Do you love tax time?

A man, called to an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. 'Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper.'

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. 'Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie.'

Confused, the man went to his rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma. 'Let me tell you a story,' replied the rabbi. 'A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: 'What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?'

'No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed.'

Good one! The only thing I got going for me is I have kids, and get an awesome return. The kids are good for that, and taking out the trash every once in a while!!

hahahha

well said

keep it up

I hate tax time...hahaha comedy gold!

i hate paying taxes

ha ha ha.

I hate paying tax.

hehe

am already screwed :P:P:P

Coopers Waterhouse still have not filed our 2006 taxes!!! Just be happy you have income to be taxed is my motto.

Lol! thats funny!

Good moral to the story.

Aaaaha haaa haaa, that's sooooo true! Every which way they can too (goes for both!) ;-P

Whats the moral of this story?

A man, called to testify at the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper," the accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice.

"Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his Rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the Rabbi. "A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. She replied suggesting that her daughter wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to her neck. But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. Wear your sexiest negligee, with a Vee neck right down to your navel."

The man protested: "Rabbi, what does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?"

"No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed"

LOL, very funny. Was not expecting that one!

....i feel like a dumb blonde.

i dont get it..

i mean i think i do...

but....

ummm

wait so like the bride is gonna get screw because shess gettin married n on the honey moon.u kno

n the IRS bc. they are gonna screw u over or something ?

idk . :(

HaHa hilarious!

hahahah loving it!!

lol funni = ]

LOL True, true. =]

lol

What to wear to an IRS audit????

A man who was called to testify at the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. "Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper," the accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. "Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his Rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the Rabbi. "A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. "Wear your most sexy negligee."

The man protested: "What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?"

The Rabbi replied, "No matter what you wear, the results are ineveitable......."

that sounds like the witty hampsters rednek joke. im blond and computer inept..but I'll try to find it and copy it 4u..hope you like it.....

Relative of Michael Jackson? (joke)?

A long-haired youth was hitchhiking through the deep South.

He got a ride from a mean-looking redneck trucker.

After riding about 30 miles in silence, the youth finally said, "Well, aren't you going to ask me?"

"Ask you what?" replied the trucker.

"If I'm a boy or a girl," answered the youth.

"Don't matter," replied the trucker. "Gonna f*ck ya anyway."

well?????

he's pretty good eh?

What wud u wear?

A man, about to undergo an IRS audit, asked his accountant for advice

on what to wear. "Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let them think you are a

pauper."

Then he asked his legal counsel the same question, but got the opposite

advice. "Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your finest suit and

tie."

Utterly confused at this point, the man went to his rabbi, told him of

the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of his dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the rabbi. "A woman, about to be

married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a

heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.'

But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear

your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: "Rabbi, what does all this have to do with my

problem with the IRS?"

"Don't you see? It doesn't matter what you wear my son! Either way, the

results will be the s

lol,,,,we get screwed left & right,,,,

Thank you for the insight........

Since they want the shirt off my back...that's all I would wear.

Nice to see a smile.........

☺☺☺☺☺

very true!!

I like that. Very good thanks

So true! ......................................lo...

whats the question?

Howz this??give a astar if u like.........?

A man, called to an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. 'Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper.'

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. 'Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie.'

Confused, the man went to his buddy, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma. 'Let me tell you a story,'

Replied the buddy.

'A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: 'What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?'

The buddy responded: "'No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed"

I loved it.You deserve a star 'cos you made my day.

LOL!

I like it is FUNNY!! Imao * for u

its good but not worth giving a star

:)

heard it before

nice

LOL, love it :)

*Good one !!!!

good

I already heard this one.. Anyway here is your *****(star)

gud.... its nice...

Good a start for you

Very true! Lol. Nice one.

good one a star 4 you

Lol....

Have a great day :-)

nice one, here is your st*r

Believe it or not these are real Country & Western songs?

It's Hard to Kiss the Lips at Night that Chew Your *** Out All Day Long

Billy Broke My Heart at Walgreens and I Cried All the Way to Sears

I Can't Get Over You, So Why Don't You Get Under Me?

If I Had My Life to Live Over, I'd Live Over a Delicatessen

If I Were In Your Shoes, I'd Walk Right Back To Me

All My Exes Live in Texas

Saddle Up the Stove, Ma, I'm Riding the Range Tonight

I Thought She Was Out Jogging, But She Was Running Around On Me

If the Phone Don't Ring, It's Me Not Calling You Up

All the Guys Who Turn Me On Turn Me Down

Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye

(Pardon Me) I've Got Someone To Kill

Peel Me a Nanner

I Got In At 2 With A 10 And Woke Up At 10 With A 2

If The Jukebox Took Teardrops I'd Cry All Night Long

If Love Were Oil, I'd be a Quart Low

Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart was Pure

I Don't Know Whether To Come Home Or Go Crazy

Just Bought a Car From a Guy That Stole my Girl, but the Car Don't Run, So I Figure We Got an Even Deal

Her Body Couldn't Keep You Off My Mind

Her Cheatin' Heart Made A Drunken Fool Out Of Me

Out Of My Head And Back In My Bed

You're A Cross I Can't Bear

At the Gas Station of Love, I Got the Self-Service Pump

How Come Your Dog Don't Bite Nobody But Me?

If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You

If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now

I Wish I Were a Woman (So I Could Go Out With a Guy Like Me)

I Would Have Wrote You a Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yuck!

It Don't Feel Like Sinnin' To Me

I'm Gettin' Gray From Being Blue

If You Can't Live Without Me, Why Aren't You Dead Yet?

Would Jesus Wear A Rolex On His Television Show?

You Hurt The Love Right Out Of Me

I Sat Down On a Beartrap (Just This Morning)

I Sent Her Artificial Flowers For Her Artificial Love

Mama, Get The Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

Heaven's Just A Sin Away

She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart

I Was Looking Back to See If You Were Looking Back to See If I Was Looking Back to See if You Were Looking Back at Me

Guess My Eyes Were Bigger Than My Heart

If Fingerprints Showed Up On Skin, Wonder Whose I'd Find On You

Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You

Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well

Gave Her My Heart and a Diamond And She Clubbed Me With a Spade

I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling

Going to Hell in Your Heavenly Arms

If Whiskey Were A Woman I'd Be Married For Sure

It Ain't Love But It Ain't Bad

Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim's Gettin' Better

I Wouldn't Take Her To a Dog Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win

I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart

She Feels Like A New Man Tonight

I May Be Used (But Baby I Ain't Used Up)

I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised

If Drinkin' Don't Kill Me Her Memory Will

Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart

If You Can't Feel It (It Ain't There)

Your Negligee Has Turned To a Flannel Nightgown

You're The Hangnail In My Life, And I Can't Bite You Off

You Changed Your Name From Brown to Jones, and Mine From Brown to Blue

Touch Me With More Than Your Hands

The Last Word In Lonesome Is "Me"

Do You Love As Good As You Look

I'll Marry You Tomorrow But Let's Honeymoon Tonight

Who's Makin' Time with the Time Keeper's Daughter, when the Time Keeper's Keepin' Time?

When We Get Back To the Farm (That's When We Really Go To Town)

Walk Out Backwards Slowly So I'll Think You're Walking In

My Shoes Keep Walkin' Back to You

You Stuck My Heart In a Old Tin Can and Shot It Off a Log

And There was Grandma, Swingin' on the Outhouse Door, Without a Shirt On

How Can I Miss You When You Won't Go Away?

I'd Rather Pass a Kidney Stone than Another Night With You

Why Do You Believe Me When I Tell You That I Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life?

He's Been Drunk Since His Wife's Gone Punk

You're the Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You

She Got The Gold Mine and I Got The Shaft

Come Out of the Wheatfield Nelly, You're Going Against the Grain

My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Sure Do Miss Him

I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life

Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life

Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone

Don't Chop Any Wood, Mother, I'm Comin' in With a Load

If You Don't Leave Me Alone I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will

She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line

Bubba Shot the Jukebox

I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me.

There Ain't Enough Room in my Fruit of the Looms to Hold All My Lovin' for You

Four on the Floor and a Fifth Under the Seat

She Offered Her Honor, He Honored Her Offer, and All Through the Night it Was Honor and Offer

Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In Bed

My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart

Thanks To the Cathouse, I'm In The Doghouse With You

They May Put Me In Prison But They Can't Stop My Face From Breaking Out

Funny stuff here...

Very good

What happens if you play country music backwards?

You get your wife and your dog back.

Some good ones

all amusing

Ha ha some good ones. That's a lot of songs yeehaw!!

:-)))

thanks

Here are a few sites with even more, including "I Gave Her My Heart and a Diamond and She Clubbed Me With a Spade" and the ever-popular "I Would Have Wrote You a Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yuck"

I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised, Merle Haggard, Johnny Paycheck

Johnny Cash has sung it to but prefer merle's

If You Can't Feel It (It Ain't There) williy nelson did a nice one of this song.

another:: one is momma she's lazy.lazyer than me..so funny.

If My Nose Was Running Money, Honey, I'd Blow It Al On You

http://www.countrysongtitles.com/

try the link above some real strange ones there

but alot ive never heard of.

Seen some of them before but many are new to me and I love em!!!

very good

very funny there Jim!!!

I believe you....why shouldn't I?

Heeyyy!!!

I happen to like country.....but I never heard of a lot of these

Very funny puggy.....Have 1234 stars

OMG!!!

Advice For An IRS Tax Audit?

A man, called to an audit by the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper."

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice.

"Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his buddy, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the buddy.

"A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: "What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?"

The buddy responded: "No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed"

lol, nice

haaaaa haaaaaaaa rotflmao!

funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =)

Yep! Oh, yes, indeedy! .........and they are professionals at it!! LOL. LOL.

NICE!!!

That was funny!!! Good 1!

WEAR NOTHING, THE I.R.S. INTERVIEWER WILL WANT TO END THE SESSION A.S.A.P.

that's funny

Joke: Does Tricky get the job with the Inland Revenue?

Tricky is called for an interfiew with the Inland Revenue and asks his accountant for advice.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let them think you're a pauper," says the accountant.

Tricky then asks his lawyer the same question....

"Don't let them intimidate you; wear your most elegant suit and tie," says the lawyer.

Confused, Tricky goes to his priest and asks him what shoud he do.....

"Let me tell you a story," says the priest. "A woman, about to be married, asks her mother what to wear on her wedding night. "Wear a heavy, long flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck," she tells her. But when she asked her best friend, she says, "Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V-neck right down to your navel."

"I don't get it," says Tricky. What does all this have to do with the Inland Revenue?"

"The moral of the story is this,"replies the priest. "Whatever you wear, you're still going to get scre#ed.

It's true. I've had to deal with them before and my mother gave me that exact same advise.

I dont think they found it to funny when i DID turn up in a v- neck sexy negligee.

It was so liberating though :)

x

very true

LOL

9/10

Keep smilin'.

cute

OMG I am LOL, that was so funny but, so frigging true!

Nice one:))

not if you wear metal pants

Again you find a good one , i see your getting your revenge on tricky , long may the madness reign we all need a good laugh and thanks for providing it .

lol - excellent. Similar one with lawyers floating about somewhere...

Yes i know only to well

you got the job

Have you ever seen a ghost or spirit or whatever you call it in your home?

This morning my husband a real skeptic in the world of afterlife and such saw a young girl he said maybe ..he didnt see real well but like between 12 and 25 walk past him in a long flannel nightgown this morning in our house. He said it was so real he got up to see who or what it was and of corse there was nothing. What do ya think of this sort of thing and its meaning? Oh by the way...Our house is new...no one has died here. and he is no longer a skeptic, just doesnt know what to think now.

The atheists seem to be the ones that dominate the religion forum. Be prepared to get lots of nasty condescending remarks.

No I haven't seen a spirit or a ghost where I live. Your husband could have seen a ghost this morning of that girl standing there or walking or whatever she was doing. It is hard to say if no one has died there as there could have been something there before the house was built and that could have been where that girl lived. But if this girl who is a ghost is freaking you or your husband out then you can always get a medium to come to your house and see if there really is a girl there haunting the house you live in.

Spirits sometimes get stuck between. Usually they are not with bad energy ( you can feel it if they are). It does not always matter how new your house is. It may still be built on a property or in an area where someone has passed. It could also be someone who;s looking out for you. If you don;t want them there, just tell them to go with God

First, not to be funny but yes to be funny...do you think your husband had been high or something or maybe in an altered state. If not, maybe he has some ability which he needs to explore further. I don't think that many people can see spirits, but my sister claims to have seen several spirits in my late grandmother's home. They say that spirits are souls trapped in the astral plane and are suffering in the afterlife, hence they do not completely leave this earthly plane. But I dunno. Good luck. Sorry if I offended you about your husband, I'm sure he wasn't under the influence.

^ghost doesn't exist the only exist is spirit of Satan, the sin that somebody practice in you house. or Idols had been dedicated evil force^

No, I have not.

Straight up no joke, this is what is going on. Evil angels impersonate people who have died. Some people refer to them as demons. I feel that this gives a wrong mental picture of what they are. Hollywood has portrayed their own ideas of demons (Red horned beasts with goat legs) and we have soaked them up. The Bible talks about 1/3 of the angels falling for Satan's lies about God's character and rebelling against Him. Those fallen angels are on earth and work desperately to confuse people about their identities. They prefer for people to believe that they do not exist. And often they will haunt people and appear as deceased loved ones or whoever they want. People have fallen for this hook line and sinker.The fact that you have a new home is great proof that there is not a ghost or some sort of left over energy(all phony ideas).

If you are telling the truth, which I believe you are, it sounds like you have one of Satan's angels messing with you. Some people are not weirded out or spooked by seeing things like this. They should be. What you have to understand is that you are not dealing with a girl. You are dealing with the devil, and you are seriously going to want to get rid of him. The Bible gives instructions on how to command the enemy to get away from you. I responded to a woman who was being was being assaulted by evil angel at night. I'm sure you could find it if you searched my best answers section. She followed the instructions and she said it worked. I also want to say that sometimes these things can be brought about by people's actions working like an invitation. If you have meddled in the occult or are currently doing some heavy, bad stuff, it may be the cause. If you can think of it, get rid of it right away. Or you may have recently started attending a church or become interested in the Bible, if so, sometimes the devil steps up his efforts to frighten people away from God since he fears he might lose them.

Now, Jesus gave his followers authority over Satan and his angels. If you are not one, this will not work. If you would like to become a follower of Jesus all you have to do is believe that he is alive and ask him to save you and forgive you of your sins. With that faith in mind, know that God is true to his Word. Claim his promise that you have authority over the devil through his power not your own. Say that stuff out loud, Satan can't read your thoughts, and he will tremble at that Name. Tell him that you belong to God, and he must leave. Command him in the name of Jesus. He has no options then. Whatever you do, do not try to talk with the evil angels, you cannot reason with them. You must simply claim your authority over them as given by Jesus to all who are his followers.

Convincing you that the supernatural exists isn't a problem. You have experienced(at least your husband) it for yourself. All you have to do is realize what you are dealing with, and that it is in fact a very serious situation. If you are a new(or old) Christian I hope this experience can help strengthen your faith in God's word, or lead you to a relationship with Him if you have not yet accepted Him. Here are some verses for you to claim. God Bless.

Read this a few times, I want to make sure what I said sinks in. If you have additional questions, post them because I will check back on you.

I lost a dear friend to cancer in 2001. In 2002, I saw her in my hallway with her dog. I told her I loved her and missed her. She smiled and looked down at the dog. Then she backed away and was gone.

I did. I'd like to forget it but I can't. It wasn't a ghost. It was a demon. As I walked into the living room late one night I saw it silhouetted against the curtain. It wasn't against the window. It was in the center of the room. I'm 5' 11", 190 pounds (almost none of it fat) and I was highly trained in hand to hand combat, but when I saw that I was scared s**tless, and the only thing I could do was run. That clearly wasn't a person, and I immediately sensed that it had no fear of me whatsoever.

When my wife saw my face she screamed, and it was several minutes before I could calm down enough to tell her what I saw. We slept with the lights on that night and for several nights after wards.

Do I really need my own nightgown/robe for my hospital bag?

The hospital said that they prefer to just provide them, but I'm not sure they'll have anything that will cover me up satisfactorily during my recover period. Will I be allowed to wear sweats and a t-shirt or do I have to stay in a gown the whole two days after? I've been to three stores in the last few weeks and I almost started crying today after shopping for three hours trying to find some sort of nighty or robe to bring to the hospital. I always just wear flannel pants, sweats or shorts and a tank or t-shirt. All the robes I've found are super-short. The nightgowns don't fit and most don't button (making it easier to nurse without lifting your whole gown up). What items do I ACTUALLY need for this bag? I hate shopping and tend to get depressed when I can't find what I need, so I want to avoid going "out there" again if possible. I ended up settling on some crappy nursing bras in a box from Mervyns because they were the first I could find that would fit me and I was too depressed to keep shopping around more stores.

I'd suggest you stick with getting some kind of nightgown rather than using sweats. I too prefer pants or shorts... but remember, you may end up having a c-section or episiotomy or something, and you can't be wearing pants if you need the nurse's assistance for the first day or two! So, personally I'd rather have a nightgown than go starkers under the sheet.

That said, you could always use a hospital gown. They've already said they prefer to provide them -- I'm certain they are able to accomodate a wide range of body types for both men and women. Even with the tie-shut kind, often you wear one on your back (like a bathrobe) and one on your front, so nothing is flapping in the breeze!

You can wear whatever you want once you have had the baby!! They can advise you to wear the hospital robe when you are in labour and giving birth but after that its up to you what you wear!

I wore a tracksuit and my own dressing gown whilst i was recovering (was in for 4 days due to c-section) and that did me just fine! Take whatever you feel comfortable in and dont let them boss you about, its up to you!!

I stole a night gown from my mom who is bigger then me that i plan to wear... But you don't really NEED to bring one. If the back being open just isn't your thing just bring your sweat pants to wear under the hospitals and think of it this way you don't have to take it home and wash it

dont get upset hun wear whatever is comfortable to u, u can wear whatever u want. try a maternity store at the mall or look online best of luck, i got my gown at wal mart and it is a nursing gown it doesnt button up but it has slits in it and it was a little big but it was comoftable and it wasnt tight which u dont want

Oh my...you can wear exactly what you want! It's a hospital not a prison...your body, your baby, you birth experience...remember YOU are in charge...of course you can wear sweats..I did....and a big t shirt...you dont have to wear, do or say anything you dont want to..you're in charge!

You cant wear sweats and a t-shirt at the hospital (which sucks) because you will be bleeding and a nurse will be coming in to clean you up. You would just ruin the pants. You can take a nightgown of your own, but it will get ruined.

I would suggest getting one just because you don't want to walk around in a hospital gown for 2 days. Your family will be in and out and the robes that tie in the back aren't exactly flattering. I went to wal mart and got a nursing robe and it was great. Here are links to a couple, then you could just order them online and not have to worry about going out.

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=8000991

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=5131405

1 thing you will learn VERY quickly in hospital about the midwives there... they are extremely opinionated on what THEY think you must and mustn't do from what you wear, to how you feed your bub ect... my most valuable piece of advice being a veteran (2 kids already and 1 on the way lol) is this.... ignore what they tell you and do what feels right!!! I wore a crappy old nighty to deliver my babies in, then i had a shower right after, and chucked on pants and a shirt and spent the entire time i was in hospital wearing similar clothes! Do not let yourself get worked up over what they want you to say... because really... with no complications arising.. you're able to safely leave hospital 6 hrs after giving birth... so if they peeve you off enough... just go home!!

Goodluck darl and don't stress... having a baby is stressful enough as it is without them being particularly annoying!

I wore their crappy gowns. One normally and one to like a robe to cover my ***. I was glad to wear and stain their clothes. :) You pass allot of gross things the first few days. Lots of blood clots etc. Its not like I didn't have a giant pad on its just as soon as you move you gush. Anyhow I brought my own long terry cloth type robe for when I took my son and went wandering. Wear what you want anyhow. Just don't wear anything too nice cause anything can happen.

You can wear whatever you want! You can even give birth naked if you want. They'll give you a quick "down there" exam before you go home. You can wear whatever you want-- all you'll have to do is take your pants off for 5 minutes. You're giving birth-- you've earned the right to be comfy!

I'd prefer sweat pants (loose) or loose flannel pants and a baggy t-shirt. You could find a shirt that zips or buttons down the front, or even just wear a bath robe. You don't need to wear a nightgown if you don't want to. By the way, expect to still look about 5 months pregnant after you give birth. So get clothes that will fit that.